So Over Feeling Sorry For Myself

So I took some time this morning to read scripture and meditate on my life. I realized that I have wasted SO MUCH TIME indulging in a pity party for one, regurgitating and recycling all the emotions of hatred, anger, misery, self-doubt, bitterness and pain because my life hasn’t ended up the way I wanted it to.

HOW FOOLISH! I believe there is a place for grief… to mourn what has been lost and to feel the pain of what has happened… but I don’t believe in wallowing. And yet, that is what I have done. For years. Well I say no more.

As I read scripture, I realized that life will continue. Troubles will come. Shit will happen. I can’t control whether or not bad things come my way. I live in a broken, bat-shit crazy world. I can’t control whether or not I will get fired tomorrow. I can’t control the decisions that people make about me. I can’t control what people think about me.

But there are many other things I can control.

  1. I can control what I choose to think about. I choose to stop thinking thoughts of self-pity, worry, doubt and fear. WHERE HAVE THOSE THOUGHTS LED ME? Answer: Nowhere productive!
  2. I can control how I spend my time. Rather than spend hours thinking about how much life sucks, and MORE HOURS scrolling through other people’s accounts of how awesome their lives are, WHY DON’T I INVEST TIME IN MYSELF, BUILDING MY DREAMS, AND TRANSFORMING MY WORLD?
  3. I can control what and who I will allow to affect me. Why should I care about what others think about me and my choices? When has that ever allowed me to live an abundant, rich and successful life? Why do I allow people, things and ideas into my life that don’t push me closer to my destiny?
  4. I can control what I value. I live in a society whose values may differ from mine. That same society pushes its values on me daily. But I must live my values. I must take the time to clarify what I believe in and fight to stay true to my values and convictions, no matter the cost. Easier said than done obviously, but seeing where I am currently… what’s the point in sacrificing my values…? Where has that led me?
  5. I can control how I spend my money…. well for the most part lol. Due to my ridiculous debt burden, most of my dollars are spoken for, but the money I’m not using to pay down debt can be used in a productive way! To generate more income! I just need to learn how!

I was very inspired by a post I read this morning in my inbox. Tonya Rapley from My Fab Finance. This woman was earning $18,000 a year while paying rent and student loans, as well as trying to maintain a social life. Within 2 years, she was able:

  1. To save $10,000
  2. Open a retirement account and reserve $12,000
  3. Travel to Paris, London and Ghana
  4. Increase her credit score 130 points
  5. Increase her earnings at her job to $32,500
  6. Quit her job and work for herself

I don’t think this woman wasted much time feeling sorry for herself. She didn’t have the luxury to! She needed to survive! And it’s no different with me. If I’m going to achieve my goals of financial freedom, personal transformation and social impact, I can’t be sitting on my behind bitter that life isn’t what I thought it would be by now. The time is now. I’ve got to shoot my shot. I’m over feeling sorry for myself!


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