Posted in Heart's Desires, If I Didn't....

I Should Have Gone to Sleep

But nah.

I couldn’t sleep. I was trying to be holy, but the growing discomfort down under begged for release (damn it ovulation!)…

I’ve been sober from porn for almost a year….

No intentions of going back.

So I jumped to the next best thing (well not best… but you catch my drift): erotica

Dumb idea.

All it did was make me even more amorous…… le sigh. Too lazy to get up and take a cold shower.

*click* *scroll* *read*

Wow… people are out here having AMAZING SEX! Or maybe that’s a lie. Maybe that’s the point of erotica…. to make things seem more sensual than they actually are. When will I learn.

On nights like these, I wish I had someone to hold me. And do more besides.

I get the bright idea (sarcasm) to watch Being Mary Jane.

Mmmmm Omari Hardwick. Gabrielle Union. Not a good idea.

Then I decide to check out Insecure.

*facepalm*

I need to go to bed now. But first.

Release.

Ah, that’s better. Now I can go to sleep. Or not….

Forty five minutes later and I awake with a start. I had a crazy case of the munchies.

Chunky apple sauce, seaweed strips, strawberry yogurt O’s cereal and some water.

Ah, I can sleep now.

*Yawn* *Snore*

I should have just went straight to sleep…… wet and full isn’t the best combination.

Posted in If I Didn't....

If I Didn’t Care About What People Thought……

  1. I would have taken Japanese in high school
  2. I would have gone to Europe in middle school and found money to get there
  3. I would have studied Psychology and Sociology starting my freshman year of college, rather than suffering through Neuroscience and pre-med classes
  4. I would have told bae that I liked him sooner rather than suffering for 2 years. And then I would have cut him off.
  5. I would wear whatever the hell I wanted to wear
  6. I wouldn’t be at this stupid job
  7. I wouldn’t have allowed my parents to get a vacuum cleaner in my name
  8. I would have had a lot more real conversations with people
  9. I would be more successful
  10. I would be happier

 

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